In my yoga classes, I have been analogizing the movement of our cells, the flow of the body into a yoga pose, to the murmurations of starlings; the clouds of black birds flying in huge numbers, an ariel synchronistic wonder floating and swirling across our autumnal skies.
Here is a beautiful photo of a murmuration:
And here is an amazing video of a murmuration, especially around 1 minute into it:
Patterns of nature are reflected in our bodies. It’s all very Tantrik.
Namaste’
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Teachers in Unexpected Places: Sugar Addiction and Yoga
Life is full of “teachers”. Each moment brings us something new to consider or realize as a truth we can use.
As a truth that we are.
Addiction is usually defined as a physiological and psychological need. The physiological need is “in the body”; the cells have become accustom to operating with a chemical component (let’s say refined sugar, for example). When the refined sugar is not there, or not in the amounts formerly available, the operations of the cells becomes “awkward”…seems to be sluggish. Like something is missing.
And there is. It’s the sugar.
It’s not uncommon to have a whomping headache for days after eliminating refined sugar from your diet. This is a physiological shift occurring in the body.
It’s known as withdrawal.
Yoga can help with lessening the physical withdrawal symptoms as the cells make the shift.
Yoga also allows us to “be with the body” as you would a friend recovering from an illness or going through a treatment.
And this is the lesson, the teaching of truth that withdrawal, whether from sugar, or alcohol and drugs, or from a toxic relationship brings us:
Healing at the physical level begins with Loving Kindess to the self.
Also known as Maitri.
A Yoga pose to cultivate Maitri (and soothe that booming headache):
Viparita Karani
This pose can be done with legs up a wall or on the seat of a chair with the back on the floor. A low support under the back allows the natural curve of the low back to be supported so you can relax fully. Place a rolled towel under the curve of your neck to support the structures/muscles of the neck. The finishing touch is an eye pillow which allows the energy of the eyes to relax back into your head. Ahhhhh.
Now really ALLOW yourself to “experience” this rather than “think” it.
May this work allow you to “be present” with your own healing journey.
Namaste’
Would like to know more about this approach to addiction?
please email me: maitriyoga@roadrunner.com
Becky Morrissey, RYT500, PCC, LICDC
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How many times has your life splashed into vivid new color; expanded, changed, and dismantled into something new over the course of your yatra- journey?
That is what has recently occurred in my world; a new working environment; a new city; a new relationship; new friends; new yoga kula; a new ME. A celebration of expansion via Shakti flow on full blast!
It’s been wonderfully crazy.
The dismantling accompanying the expansion has been very frightening at times. The shadow in all the dazzling light, cool dis-ease when you most want to be happy. It’s that fear that I react to, recoil and wiggle away from; and I do it by “checking out”, not really being in the present moment of my own expansion. Instead of celebrating, I check out by torturing myself with ridiculous inner dialogue:
“Is this real?” Well, it is happening, isn’t it?
“Do I deserve this?” Who would determine that anyway?
“What would so-and-so think?” Again, why are we giving power to so and so?
“Will it last?” It has a better chance if you stop this ridiculous questioning!
And I question everyone around me..
“Are you sure?” Yes, that’s why I am here.
“How do you know?” Why is the sky blue?
“Convince me you care.” Give me a chance.
I am strangling my own happiness with this fear management style I attend to. I resort to it because culturally we are educated to “research the situation and protect ourselves”…to prudently ask the questions so we will to not be proved “stupid” later. That’s the “smart” thing to do.
But sometimes,
when those questions really have no sure answer
Life reminds me to Believe.
It turns me on my head
expands my heart
and suddenly
I am right where I should be, despite all my “intelligent” checking out, questioning doubts, anxiety-ridden inner dialogue.
Jai Life! Celebrate its joys and shadows.
One of my favorite writings, from Tao of Healing by Haven Trevino, meditation 36:
To create, dismantle first. To expand, contract first.
To attain clarity, allow confusion.
To become civilized, first live in the wind.
The balance of all things is in their opposites; the truth points in both directions.
Thus the clenched fist holds weakness..and the open hand offers the hidden power of the suns!
Lovely Summer Solstice to you.
Namaste’
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Golden Dragon Acrobats, photo by mcline
Lately I have been ruminating on the spinning nature of mind : ). And a new friend inspired me to write about it.
Intrusive thoughts, such as the song you can not get out of your head, or what you would have said if you had thought of it in that not-so-wonderful interaction you had with so-and-so, or the worry you have about something happening in a certain way for you…these thoughts are distracting and highly energy consuming.
And like everything in this crazy yin-yang life, intrusive, ruminative thinking, even obsessive-compulsive second guessing, does have benefits and costs. Light and shadow. Movement and “stuckness”.
Spin Surfing, photo by mcline
The yogis taught the concept of Brahmacharya, discernment regarding how much we want or should invest of ourselves in any activity (like rumination). I like to think of Brahmacharya as a light of wisdom in my heart that can be used to reveal the color, texture, and evolutionary movement of the spinning, churning mosaic of the beautiful mind. It’s my way to be in the center of the spin without being consumed by it.
Spin Fire, mcline
In the Bhagavad Gita, Krishna teaches Arjuna how to know Brahmacharya:
10:11 Because I am compassionate, I dwell in your heart, and from there remove the darkness of ignorance with the light of wisdom.
I once heard a fellow yogi liken brahmacharya to an oil lamp, a light of wisdom, that is fueled by the oil of contentment. The container of the oil is discernment. So if one knows and uses discernment, one has a container, a space, for contentment.
Your heart is the container for the wise light of discernment while the mind organizes the directive energy to act upon it. Discernment, as a form of wisdom, does not come from the mind alone..perhaps that would be prejudice or discrimination, but not discernment. Discernment is compassion and wisdom woven together. Brahmacharya is the action of the discerning, wise, and often spinning mind.
If we allow ourselves to ”witness” the spin of the mind via meditation and therapeutic ways to compassionately work with obsessive-compulsive thinking, limitations and potentials are revealed. Some things are clear for our discernment…others are a blur of movement that will need time to understand.
Overhead Spin mcline
Here are some ideas for working with a spinning mind. Adapted from Jeffery Schwartz’s Brain Lock Unlock therapy, and Becky-ized to blend with an anatomic and yogic approach, I love how this allows me to intellectualize, visualize, somatize, and embody Brahmacharya. May it be a help to you too, my friends. : )
“Getting Unstuck: Surfing the Spinning Mind”
Mental “Stickness”: holding on to worries and/or becoming compulsive and driven by “habits” (obsessive thinking about worries, excessive concern about what others think about us, self image, the body, low self esteem, substance use, eating, compulsive second guessing…)
How to Get Unstuck: Intellectualize the Process
When we make a mistake, the following process happens:
Brain Anatomy: We detect mistakes with the orbital frontal cortex. It activates the “mistake feeling” via neuropsychogenic pathways.
The cingulate gyrus receives that activation, and triggers the drive to correct the mistake. The cingulate gyrus is part of the limbic system, or “emotional brain”, and therefore the central nervous system. So we feel anxiety emotionally and physically (heart palpitations, perhaps nausea). A feeling of dread persists until we “fix” the issue. And sometimes afterwards.
The caudate nucleus is what allows our thought to flow away from the issue once it has been fixed, unless it is “sticky” with neutral pathway stimulation that does not cease below the “activation” threshold.
A malfunctioning caudate is one that is being overstimulated with signals from the orbital frontal cortex. This leads to hyperadrenal issues, panic attacks, and other psychogenic problems.
Spinning Landing mcline
Somatizing and Embodying the Healing: Two Key Steps to “getting unstuck” (getting the orbital frontal cortex to spin down):
A meditation for you:
May I love myself just as I am.
May I sense my worthiness and well-being.
May I trust this world.
May I hold myself in compassion.
May I meet the suffering and ignorance of others with compassion.
Many ways to Be mcline
Namaste’ my friends!
Join me for “Yoga and Your Brain: A Love Story”, a workshop revealing the effect of yoga upon the brain’s neuroplasticity, its ability to change ; complete with a practice to embody the teachings. July 18th 1-3:30 pm at the Bryan Center. Check out “classes and workshops” for cost/register info.
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Bluegrass Glass.....photo by matt cline
Beginning a Home Practice: Not What You Think!
Mahima (Ma-HEE-ma) is the yogic principle of expansion…of the body, of the mind, of the heart. In order to “commit” to “practicing at home”, I believe a mahima, an expansion of the definition of what yoga IS, is in order! Is yoga ONLY getting the mat out at a studio, or even at home, and doing some exercises? Or is yoga walking the dog…doing the dishes…talking to a friend…walking in the woods….or crying your eyes out when you feel like it. : ) Once we realize that we are practicing yoga all the time (as the word “Yoga” does mean “union”, after all) then we realize that the poses are themselves metaphors; for understanding how we habitually relate to ourselves, and how we could interact more naturally with our own lives.
For instance, triangle pose…it has us going in 6 directions at once, much like life! So when we “practice life” in triangle pose, we find that we do have the strength to withstand, and even gracefully balance, having our energies “pulled” in several different directions at once! This is the blessing of yoga.
A broadening, or expansion, of the terms “home” and “practice” is also needed to really “get” what yoga IS. “Home” simple means “where you are” and “practice” does not have to indicate a specific class or studio experience, or even performing a certain sequence of yoga poses! We come to realize that we “practice yoga”, or “union” every time we take a breath, with every action and interaction we have. With this realization, or transformation in how we relate to yoga (from just exercise to a natural way of being) a “practice” becomes a spontaneous exploration of a body stretch in the kitchen, or a twist in the chair at work, movements that are quite irresistible and most times almost spontaneous! You will find yourself striking a pose, doing yoga, whenever you need a release of tension or a boost of energy-confidence (“if I can do a revolved triangle for 5 breaths without falling over, I certainly can find balance in other ways!”).
When yoga becomes a knowing in your life, it becomes effortlessly easy to set aside time to have an asana-meditation practice, because the definition of what yoga practice is becomes “a natural expression of who you are”, not what someone else tells you it has to be.
Namaste’ my friends!
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Drops of Bliss bk 2010
Often I find my inspiration to live simply and fearlessly from observing, and listening, to the visual love-speak of Mother Nature.
Spring is the epitome of emerging…and isn’t emerging a fantastic word! A coming out…and a reaching out…a seeking to MERGE with everything around us.
Inspiration to merge with your own soul.
Flowing Soulwater bk 2010
I have been dancing in my mind with Yoga Sutra III.45. The third book of the Yoga Sutras, the Vibhutipadah (Exceptional Faculties) is very esoteric and wonderful to pour through the soul of your yoga practice. It asks you to fearlessly, openly use your yogic imagination and see an emerging newness about yourself:
“With samyama (meditative study) on the physical elements** and their essential nature, an understanding of the soul emerges” (translation my own)…
**and these are not your usual physical elements. They are things like lightness, expansion, reduction, vastness. Check it out, especially Bouanchaud’s edition The Essence of Yoga; Reflections on the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. Or comment/email me for a copy of Sutra III.45 : ).
This sutra inspires us to ask questions of our habitual, conditioned thinking about everything. We can easily take what we think we know (whatever “know” means) as “all there is to know” and not look any deeper. But that’s like quitting before we even get started!! Instead, we could allow ourselves to open in this imaginative, very human way. Why is this so hard sometimes? Fear. It’s that simple.
Every yoga asana is a personal springtime emergence, a blossoming of body-mind. The next time you are in your favorite energetic pose, find the mahima, the physical element of expansion/growth, in everything about the pose… the body sensations… and in all that is swirling in your mind in that moment. See the emergence of Present Moment…and move deeper into it, move deeper inside the “landscape” of the pose. Blossom fearlessly, like a March flower, and find something new.
Sat Nam: What IS mcline 2010
Springtime flowers are so inspirational to me, and to everyone I think, because they are not afraid to blossom in the NOW. Springtime conditions are very transitional…for one living in fear of the Now, it might seem best to wait, and blossom closer to summer, when there is less threat of a chilling freeze.
But how sad would that be for us, who take such delight and inspiration in seeing the emergence of these tiny, but so delightfully fearless beacons of the coming of Light.
Springtime flowers teach us not to be hostages of our conditioning…they MERGE with what is in the moment, express themselves authentically, and adapt accordingly.
Not afraid to blossom…wow. We can learn a lot from flowers. : )
Fearlessly Adaptable mcline 2010
Namaste friends! With joyful peace-light, b
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Sun Lit Ice Jar, photo by b krebs
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photo by Becky Krebs, Glen Helen
I went for a long hike today in the Glen…after the chaos of the snowstorm. I could not wait to be liberated from the containment of the roof over my head and to be in the austere spaciousness of winter in the woods.
I also went to the woods to ”walk” on some of my mindtangles. Sitting meditation is fantastic, but at times a walking meditation allows me to see my struggles in the metaphor of nature. There is something very comforting about that for me.
The snow was a heavy burden for the trees to bear, but they did it with swaying grace as the wind dance-flowed through them. I wondered if I could hold up under the weight so well. Everywhere I looked the limbs were thatched together in crystalline snowtangles of chaos. Branches created bowers hanging low over the trail, encrusted with 2 inch thick puffed ice-snow. I brushed past them with wishes for the lifting for their burden soon. One could feel cold, deep gravity pouring them into the earth.
I noticed something else about the trees…they were not struggling against the icy-snow weight. In fact, they were bowing to it. Moving with it. They were relaxing into it, and moving toward the support of the earth. Wow, I thought to myself, the trees are doing yoga. Working with chaos instead of struggling against it.
We can do the same..we can learn to relate openly with chaos, with difficult situations and heavy emotions, as a means to awaken and experience deeper understanding, and even unconditional joy. Welcome the struggle with chaos as a sacred experience.
Three ways of relating to chaos are traditionally taught in mindfulness teachings;
First, like the trees, we remember to stop struggling against it. We stop fighting with ourselves, others, the situation, emotions, moods. As Pema Chodron advises, “whatever arises, we can look at it with a non-judgmental attitude.”
Second, we breathe and lean into the experience, and see the chaos as an opportunity to learn something, to awaken to another perspective or “think bigger”. This process is also taught as “using poison as medicine”. In order to do this, we can not resent the chaos, we actually embrace it. Or at least get out of it’s way as it moves through you and out of your life. But we don’t avoid, we attenuate the chaos. It takes courage, and patience to do this. It is a practice, so it takes practice : ).
Third, we consider or allow whatever arises, the chaos itself, to be ”awakened energy”. This way of relating to chaos reverses our usual habit of avoiding it at all costs, which usually makes the situation worse anyway! When we see it as an opportunity to awaken, chaos becomes an energy we can use with grace and wisdom. We can bow to it as a visitation from a guru with something beautiful and important for us to know.
We can bow to chaos with gratitude. Working with chaos instead of struggling against it; this is the wisdom life-yoga has to teach all of us.
Walk on the thought-water. Surf the mindtangles with ease. Be present now. Namaste’ my friends!
Walking on Thought Water, photo b krebs
Teachings from When Things Fall Apart by Pema Chodron.
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Someone once said, “Resistance is futile”.
In many ways, I think the Borg is right (wasn’t it the Cyborg from Star Trek who that said that, if the Cyborg is a “who”, so to speak ?). But exploring our habitual patterns of resistance is a Yatra (journey) very much worth embarking on.
It’s another powerful Mindtangle that seems to be a protector, and a jailer, all at the same time. A guru that works behind our awareness, covertly steering us toward status quo, turning us away from what seems wildly threatening or delightfully extraordinary. That’s sad because the unexpected, threatening, wild, and extraordinary is exactly the often necessary gifts from the universe that are needed for our healthy personal evolution.
The power and influence of Resistance is confounding and beatific. Often it communes with us using the voice of your mother or maybe grandmother : ). A voice we trust. So we become attached to it for love, protective direction, and “wisdom”. We try to predict the future with it. It assures us it will keep us safe. It likes us to be dependent on it, and at times it has worked beautifully for us so we will be.
I believe it is deeply braided into the core of our egos, which isn’t a bad thing at all, but it can make us painfully rigid and unable to appreciate-relax into the beautiful, dawn-light quality of unexpected personal evolution. For some of us more than others.
So what are we resisting? Oftentimes it is change, perceived as a threat rather than an opportunity. Perception of impending, unasked for change is a stimulus for strong emotions, usually ones of uncertainty. In general, humans do not prefer to feel uncertain about anything, especially things that are wrapped into the soul of our identity, perhaps as an ”expert” of something.
The way we relate to uncertainty is usually with major discomfort. People who put great value upon intellectual “knowledge”, being regarded as an “expert”, seem to suffer with receiving the “gift” of uncertainty quite a bit. In other words, being uncertain often makes us feel stupid or inadequate. Or maybe we just project that others will think we are stupid, a fraud, and/or inadequate if we authentically allow our uncertainty to show.
In this way, Resistance powers rigidity of thought-being and shutdowns down our natural, liberating willingness to feel, to live in, the entire range of human emotions available to us. This is how it becomes the jailer. The illusion of ”if I resist changes I did not ask for, have a plan to remove the change-threat with a sure-hard response, everything will be alright. No one will know that I wasn’t right or in complete control. If I treat everything as a threat first, and ask questions or clean up the mess later, I will be safe”. This is life on fearful autopilot. And often it leads to a crash and burn. Just like the Borg.
It’s the narrow way we relate to the guru of Resistance that could use a bit of fresh perspective. Resistance teaches us that having “student-mind” or relating to life with an openness to all the possibilities allows us the full freedom of experience, minus the fogged-up filters of “needing to know” what is impossible to really know anyway!
Pema Chodron writes of cultivating a “groundlessness” in how we approach life; we experience this as a willingness to embrace feeling uncertain every chance you get with a deep breath, a stretch of the body jar and mind, and opening to a sense of life-giving joy while in the experience, like when you open an unexpected gift from a loved one. It takes practice, and a willingness to feel whatever comes. You realize after doing this a while that you won’t die if you feel a heavy emotion, like embarrassment, or approach life with unconditional openness rather than a heavy shield of put-on expert knowing. Hearing the voice of Resistance then becomes a clue for “thinking bigger”, “loving bigger”, “living bigger”, using the power of discernment to relax into a safe but awake quality. Using Resistance to be awake is a much more productive relationship with ourselves, allowing us to trust the gifts of the Universe, rather than live in fear. We learn to use Resistance as a way to navigate the flow of life rather than to build dams of rigidity to try to control it.
We must be willing to swim and take a chance if we really want to live. Be like a fish in your ocean of grace.
Check out Pema Chodron’s Comfortable with Uncertainty. Be groundless every chance you get!
Namaste my friends!
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“Along the surface of every mind there are knots. Mindtangles. They appear as puckers, sink holes in the cohesion of the surface of your mind. They are mesmerizing, slippery, and they activate the Inner Story Teller’s energy before you even know you are lost in it. They have their own qualities. Each mindtangle is complex, and beautiful, in a complicated way.
Mindtangles. We have a tendency to identify with them beyond equilibrium. We believe our mindtangles, our one-sided opinions and beliefs, to the point of being enslaved.”
One of the most familiar, complex, enslaving, and beautiful mindtangles to observe is the samsaric knot of jealousy.
Jealousy is a powerful guru. When appreciated in a way that opens our mindful awareness, jealousy can be an awesome opportunity to notice and identify with your own panoramic beauty. Unfortunately, we usually shut down rather hard around jealousy, to protect a tender, long nursed hurtful wound.
All of us have slipped into the mindtangle of jealousy, either our own feelings of jealous tangle…or find ourselves enslaved by someone else’s… at one point of time or another.
Jealousy seems to be a function of relational complexity. For example, it’s easy to look at a tulip and acknowledge it’s beauty without becoming jealous of it. Most people do not look upon a tulip and say to themselves in a fit of jealous rage, ”God, what an absolute tart to be wearing that shade of magenta in broad daylight. Who does that trollop of a tulip think she is? And those petals…they must be augmented, there is no way those are real.” No, we simply appreciate the tulip as beautiful because we have an uncomplicated relationship, a simple definition, of tulip beauty. Maybe carnations think tulips are trollops but we humans usually do not. : )
We seem to experience our own jealousy more often then finding ourselves the target of it. Jealousy mushrooms inside the dimmer places of our mental landscape when we perceive what appears to be for us an unobtainable quality in someone else, such as a sense of ease, confidence, beauty, wisdom, or a type of relationship we always wanted, or the possessions of another. Sometimes we feel the “pangs of jealousy” without the epidural at the most surprising times. Those pangs have a way of shrinking the Technicolor prism of Easy Joy down to a single point so quickly it can take your breath away. Jealousy feels isolating, dark, toxic, bitter. Most of us wiggle away from it as quickly as possible. Few of us think to immediately, lovingly, and simply acknowledge feeling it, even though to do so is the most liberating, non-resistant, and healthy way to experience the lesson of jealousy.
There seem to be two ways that people interact with their own jealousy; aversion or aggression. We either distance ourselves somehow from the object of our jealousy, or we strike out at it and try to destroy it.
Being held hostage by someone else’s jealousy is a deeper level of complicated entanglement. It’s flattering and strangling all at the same time. It’s difficult to talk about because it feels conceited to acknowledge it; yet it festers if we try to ignore it and hope it goes away. The person who is jealous of you seems to seethe every time they see you, every time you are recognized or complimented, every time you shine in your own way. If you try to diminish yourself to appease their “hurt” feelings, you find yourself feeling controlled by their unresolved sensibilities in a way that, over time, becomes a thick, scaly resentment. It drains your energy and painfully stifles your authentic, creative expression. You begin to walk on egg shells around the person, trying to show them there is nothing to be jealous of; but in the end, that appeasement simply feeds their discomfort because now they know that you know how they feel about you! What a hot mess of a mindtangle!
It can be a no win situation, especially if the jealous party shuts down communication because they are embarrassed or scared. At times, the best way out of this mindtangle, the only way to stop their Jealous Inner Story Teller from running amok is to simply stop struggling and let the situation run it’s course. Sometimes the egg shells become so sharp that you must get off them, before you bleed to death trying to fix something that wasn’t your problem in the first place.
But how can we release ourselves from the mindtangle of our own jealousy? We can not walk away from it, it’s like our shadow…but since it is our own, we have the power to transform it.
Feeling jealousy, a body-soul tension in the belly or shoulders, can be recognized as an opportunity to simply notice a presence of beauty, to broaden our capacity to relate to beauty in all it’s aspects in a deliciously uncomplicated way. We have to be willing to drop the story-lie of what we are not and just appreciate what is. That takes practice. Be patient.
In order to take the power out of the story-lie, we recognize what we are really jealous of; and that is the positive, beautiful perception we have of someone other than ourselves. We wish that we felt as positive about ourselves as we do about the object of our jealousy, and we are so very hurt because we do not. We probably never really have. Jealousy is an expression of painful grief, self-hatred, of sorrowful unresolved hurt that longs to be addressed with maitri, loving kindness.
Simply acknowledge feeling jealous. To do so is the most liberating, non-resistant, loving, and healthy way to experience the lesson of Jealousy; that our rigid, small definition of ourselves is painfully stifling and untrue. That we long to identify with external beauty in a way that amplifies our self- expression and confidence, not diminish it. That is a gift you must give yourself.
So the next time you feel the pangs of jealousy, the pinching contraction of consciousness around a heavy, bitter feeling, stop the story-lie by taking a deep natural breath. Expand yourself into a knowing that beauty infinitely defined is the truth of who you are. Exhale the knowledge that jealousy is simply a reminder to live bigger, think bigger, love yourself and others bigger. : )
namaste’ my friends-b
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